6 weeks

Ok, well actually we don't know how far along I am because I don't go to the dr for several more weeks so I am just guessing.

I think these first several weeks are my least favorite, not because of the tiredness and nausea, but because I don't know WHAT you are. Are you another sweet girl? Are you a mommas boy? I love finding out what sex my babies are so I can begin to imagine and fall in love with you even more. Of course I love you now, but there is something so satisfying about thinking of names, and making blankets for you and thats hard to do when we don't know who you are.

We are going to a new OB after all the troubles Dr Judd gave me. He seemed alright at the time, but now looking back and understanding more, he was not the best choice for me.

Since Madison came early, this pregnancy may be considered "high risk" and I would like a Dr that is willing to listen to me. Our first Dr appt is November 10th. They will draw my blood, listen to the heart beat and do a little ultrasound to see you. I can't wait. Daddy will be working and starting fire school so he wont be able to attend this first visit and I think he is very upset about it. However, Mimi will be in town so we are dragging her along so she can see everything and help with Madison. I think she will be VERY excited.

We told Grandma and Grandpa earlier last week and told all the siblings on Sunday at dinner. Madison wore a "I'm the best big sister" shirt and we just kinda waited until people noticed. BUT having 5 uncles, no one cares. Aunt Lindsay seemed to care and of course it sparked her "need for another baby" so lets see if she has one now.

We haven't told My parents yet because we are waiting till they get here for a visit and we will tell them on Mimi's 50th birthday.

I have been feeling waves of sickness so far but I am not taking any medication this time around. Last time it made me so sleepy with Madi I could barely keep my eyes awake. Now trying to entertain a toddler, that won't be possible. I haven't thrown up yet but I do get waves of sickness and food aversions sometimes. We will see how this little bean continues to grow. I seem to have insomnia most nights which has made it a little rough, but I still have enough energy during the day so I appreciate that.

Here we go again -- Kiddo #2

Tonight we got a positive pregnancy test. Oh how funny the Lord is with his timing. Gosh. I have too many emotions going on in my head right now.

We have been thinking of having another baby for several months now. Our original plan was to get pregnant right around Madison's second birthday and then have a baby the following spring. Then we could have the baby before we left for medical school, or whatever life had in store for us. BUT Back in March I had a feeling that we needed to start trying sooner, reluctant we still tried. I believe we got pregnant in May but lost the baby early July. I knew I was pregnant but something didn't feel right. A few weeks later I miscarried. It wasn't as emotional as I had thought, I think maybe I knew all along and so I didn't get so attached. Looking back it is still sad.

So after then we tried and tried and tried and every month would pass and I think Dad would get a little sad. Then in September we decided that we were going to stop trying for a while. We were alright with just having Madison and the timing for another was just not going to work out. But then as I was about to start my period in September I had this overwhelming feeling to wait just one more month before going back on birth control. I talked to Zach about it and he felt the same.

October rolled around and everything was going smoothly in life. I had been feeling so tired and having a couple symptoms of early pregnancy but I didn't want to let it get in my head and get my hopes up in case it was another negative test. My period is scheduled to start tomorrow but after an extremely exhausting day (for no reason) I decided to grab a pregnancy test while at the grocery store. I decided to just take a test really quick tonight just so I knew that my period would start soon. Seriously, within seconds the two lines showed up. I FREAKED out. I was not expecting it. I ran upstairs as Zach was bringing in groceries and started to cry and couldnt say a word. He just kept saying SERIOUSLY?? SERIOUSLY?? You better not be kidding. Are you kidding? -- Again almost hyperventilating and shaking my head yes. He ran down stairs to look at the test. He was beaming with the biggest smile you have ever seen. I think that will be my favorite memory every. Madison came running up and giving me a hug asking why I was sad. I don't think she understands that people can have happy tears. I was just completely overcome with emotions. I am thrilled, scared, nervous and probably a million other things. I think it will set it more tomorrow.

I guess our original plan was the correct plan all along. Always rely on the Lord my darlings (I can say that now).. His plan is always better then yours.

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Let's have a little update on what is going on right now in our lives. Madison turned two, she is still not sleeping through the night but she is talking more every day and is so smart. I hit the one year mark of my bow shop and also hit 700 sales in the etsy store. I am getting better every day at this wife and mother thing but I know I will be closing up shop as soon as I have this kiddo. I need sleep and to enjoy every minute of my babies and my free time will be much more limited.

Daddy starts fire school next month. In the state of Utah you need to be a paramedic AND firefighter in order to work at a fire station. He is also taking this emergency skills course for two weeks at the college. He is about to be a super busy guy. We are just working on a back up plan if we don't end up going to medical school. We have gotten several secondaries but no interviews yet. They still have a couple months but I hope we would at least get one invite to interview. Oh well, Life is all about how you handle plan B.